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Rank: Thrash Admin
Joined: 3/25/2007
Posts: 810
Location: Plymouth, MA
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Anyone got any funny arrest stories they want to share? Don't really want to know about you killing someone, but maybe something funny, like caught shitting in public or something...
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Rank: Thrash Admin
Joined: 3/31/2007
Posts: 555
Location: Nashua, NH
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I didn't get arrested for this but it is a funny story. We were driving my drunk friend Trish home from a bar one night and we had to pull over every 5 minutes so she could puke. Needless to say I had been drinking a bit myself and I had to take a piss so I finally got tired of waiting and used the opportunity to take a leak on the side of the highway while she puked her brains out. Midway through my piss a Massachusetts state trooper pulls up along side of us... It scared the piss out of me (literally) as I tried to stop the stream and zip up my pants (Public urination gets people arrested on Cops all the time)... Anyways the cops talked to us for like 15 seconds to check that the designated driver wasn't drunk and then sped off. I looked down to realize that my pants now had a wet spot in them, but at least I didn't get busted for indecent exposure or anything lol.
"...Our fear of death is what kills us."
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Rank: Thrash Demigod
Joined: 4/1/2007
Posts: 363
Location: New Hampshire
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I'm too good to get arrested, BUT if you want shitting in public...
One January night when I was seventeen my friends and I found ourselves at Denny's one late night, bored, and a little tipsy. One prank lead to another, and I went from spitballs on the ceilling and moaning so the people in the kitchen could hear me to a dare that I should shit in the sink in the bathroom. (This was not my first shitting in a random spot incident. Previously, it was in a mens urinal at school.) Sorry to say, I did it. About a month later I happened to find myself at the same establishment while some of the same people were there who were no longer my friends. They decided to tell the manager it was me that did it, and the manager came over to the table with the cops and tried to call me out. I told her she was fucking crazy, that I was "staight edge to the max", and that I was happy to never come back again. As I left, I trashed the place, and then trashed that girls car, while my friends with me called her a whale and a cow (she was 300 fucking pounds).
Good times! :d/
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Rank: Lurker
Joined: 4/18/2007
Posts: 7
Location: NH
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I once got arrested for slamming a cat into the ground, someone has a picture of me doing it with the cat in mid air, I think its on here somewhere.
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Rank: Thrash Admin
Joined: 3/25/2007
Posts: 810
Location: Plymouth, MA
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joe_thrash wrote:I once got arrested for slamming a cat into the ground, someone has a picture of me doing it with the cat in mid air, I think its on here somewhere. We all appreciate your hate toward animals Joe, we really do, i swear 
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Rank: Thrash Master
Joined: 7/10/2007
Posts: 269
Location: New York
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[part 1]
One night in the middle of winter 3 friends and I decided to go rob a store...just on a whim. The planning for this operation took about a total of 20 minutes. Things were clearly about to go wrong. We got a bunch of black clothing on and head out around midnight. We were headed toward a video game store about a mile away. One of my friends and I stood behind a Firestone building while the other two went to see if they could break in and make sure the coast was clear. We were just standing there for about 10 minutes when all of a sudden the two guys that went to break in came running up to us...
The plot thickens in part 2.
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Rank: Thrash Master
Joined: 7/10/2007
Posts: 269
Location: New York
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[part 2]
You'll probably need names so this story is less confusing. I was standing behind the Firestone building with Billy. Terry and Mike were the ones that went to break in then get us if everything was ok. Anyway, Terry and Mike are running toward us and Terry says, "The alarm went off!." I'm thinking, "You're fucking kidding me..." I thought he was just messing around until I saw the red and blue flashing lights. I knew I had to fucking haul ass outta there. Terry stopped for a second but when he saw the lights he turned too fast and started running, but the way he took his first step he ended up breaking his ankle. We all got about 300 yards away when we realized that cars could go faster than we could run so we ended up stopping. They did the regular procedure: questions, hand cuffs, show you what you did. Turns out Terry and Mike threw a huge pot at the door and shattered the window. (great idea) Terry and I were put into one cop car while Billy and Mike were in another. The cops forgot to pat us down so Terry stuffed the screwdriver he had in his hoodie under the seat in the car.
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Rank: Thrash Master
Joined: 7/10/2007
Posts: 269
Location: New York
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[part 3]
They haul us off to the police station and handcuff us to chairs to make sure we wouldn't get away. As if at 1:30 in the morning we're gonna get brave enough to run for it. They took statements from us one by one and took our mugshots and fingerprints...the whole nine yards. We got our court dates and fines and whatnot. Fun times. So yea that was my night of attempted robbery. The cop taking our statements though was an idiot. He had a little calculator thing next to him that acted as a spell check. He asked how to spell words as simple as window. Pretty pathetic. People who know about this story also think it's funny and ironic that I'm going to college for criminal justice.
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Rank: Thrash Admin
Joined: 3/31/2007
Posts: 555
Location: Nashua, NH
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xXBlindEyeHaloXx wrote:[part 3]
People who know about this story also think it's funny and ironic that I'm going to college for criminal justice. Haha thats definitely the best part right there. If you guys really wanted to rob somewhere you should have just done it the easy way. Go to Best Buy, grab whatever you want, and then walk out the front door. When I worked there some guy walked out with a $1000 Bose 321 system haha.
"...Our fear of death is what kills us."
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Rank: Thrash Master
Joined: 7/10/2007
Posts: 269
Location: New York
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Holy shit that's awesome. I've done other things like that. Basically the same group of kids and I broke into a flower shop that we used to work at...such a lame place but it was money under the table so we dealt with it. Our boss was a dick so we ended up emptying the register, getting his digital camera, and a bottle of whiskey. It was a decent night.
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Rank: Thrash Master
Joined: 7/25/2007
Posts: 253
Location: New York
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One time I was driving, doing 105 in a 40. A cop stopped me and when he got to my window I flipped him off. He got WICKED angry and drew his sidearm, and I drew a giraffe and took off. About 4 miles down the road I realized that I was in a high speed chase. I threw a half-eaten bag of chips out the window and the cop ran them over, popping 3 out of 4 tires. He shook his fist at me and I shook mine back, dropping it out the window.
Instead of going back for my fist, I just opened the glove compartment and took out the spare. I re-attached it and turned on the wings of the car. I flew up into the sky and hit a pigeon it went- KAW! KAW KA- OH SHIT! BUK-'
So the pigeon rested in peace while I flew to the planet beer and me and my uncle Jeff played Mortal Kombat for Super-Nintendo. He always loses because he doesn't know the special moves... and he hasn't realized yet that his controller is unplugged.
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Rank: Thrash Admin
Joined: 3/25/2007
Posts: 810
Location: Plymouth, MA
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RandalxGraves wrote:and he hasn't realized yet that his controller is unplugged.
I would have believed it until this line. Obviously your lying!
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Rank: n00b
Joined: 9/26/2007
Posts: 7
Location: Boston, MA
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Aw man, my arrest story is just kinda annoying. Now let it be said that I've done a fair number of things in my life that I probably SHOULD have gotten arrested for, but never did. Then I was wicked sick one night at college and decided to take a night off of the obligatory freshman year of drinking until my liver gives. I went downstairs to give some friends a bag to smuggle booze upstairs in for their own enjoyment. There was this wicked cute guy I was chatting with while I waited for them to get there. They get there, and stupidly pop the trunk while I'm walkin up with the bag--the second I put it down and start to walk away the cute guy I was talkin to walks up shows me his badge and reads me my rights for minor in possession of alcohol. sucks eh?
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Rank: Thrash Demigod
Joined: 4/1/2007
Posts: 363
Location: New Hampshire
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Haha oh man Meagan that suuuucks. Especially because he was cute. What a dick, using his good looks to his own advantage. Speaking of which...
So this is an almost arrest story from last Saturday. So I was at work (PS fuck that place) and I had had a few drinks while I was on the clock, and then a few drinks after at the club. Needless to say I am underage, so it makes things a little more tricky. Carl and I decided to go party with some friends of ours a few towns over, so I follow him back to his place to drop off his car, and on the way there we find a construction cone lying in the middle of the road. Well of COURSE we grab it and throw it in the back seat. Then we're driving along on our way to Milford at 2am and I've driven this route 75849376 times before. Well there's this stop sign on a side street for a railroad that never has a train on it, ever. And even if it did, we would be able to hear it and see it coming. So, I blow it doing 40mph. Well, there was a cop waiting for me.
So I pull over and try to stay calm while getting all my shit out. I'm getting Carl to slip me a piece of gum and PRAYING the cop isn't an ass and wont search the car, because I had a box of booze in my trunk. And I mean a BOX. Oh, and I'm all dressed up form being at work too. Well I roll down the window and pull my whole ditsy "hehe officer would you like to see my license and registration?" (BOOBIES)
Just kidding. Really.
But I definitely am being as cute and girly as possible. I apologized for running the stop sign because theres never a train there and hes FLIRTING back with the whole oh well sometimes theres a cop there. And then he asks me why theres a cone in the back seat and I make up this BULLSHIT story about how Carl knows the guy that owns the condominium complex and how he was going to drop it off in the morning. So the cop goes back to his cruiser and Carl and I start making out for his enjoyment while he has the spot light on us. The cop comes back and writes me a warning and tells me he should have arrested me for reckless driving and having stolen government (if misplaced) property. I thank him bunches and ask him his name, just trying to make an impression just in case he stops me again.
And if he does, I'm gonna ask him to handcuff me and show me what he can do with his baton.
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Rank: Thrash Novice
Joined: 6/6/2007
Posts: 58
Location: Plymouth, MA
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Julie:
Do you look for trouble or does it find you? And as far as the cone... why didn't you shove in the trunk? I think that if the cop was flirting with you... he would not be turned on by you and Carl making out...I think that he would have been jealous...
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Rank: n00b
Joined: 2/6/2008
Posts: 1
Location: nashua, nh
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my last arrest story is anything, but funny. however, after one of my highschool proms when i was 16, a bunch of us went camping in some nh national park. apparently they're huge dicks and specifically look for younger kids there by themselves and just search their sites. we had four camp sites total, but only 3 of them had tents set up on them. a couple of us were on one of the tent sites, including myself, trying to get a fire going, while about 15 kids were hanging out on the empty one playing "killer hacky sack" where if you miss the ball or touch it with your hands you have to walk around in a circle and let everyone punch you. i think it's just a natural reaction for you to yell and swear and get pissed off when someone punches you, but apparently it's not a good idea to in a campground. needless to say, some crazy campground employee that thought he was hot shit and a couple cops came strolling onto the site. only thing is, instead of going to the empty site where everyone was yelling and shit, they came to the one where we were quietly setting up the fire and started looking in the tents. next thing we know we're all being handcuffed. only thing is there wasn't enough because it was some tiny ass little town. a couple people got handcuffed together, but for some reason i got handcuffed to the belt loop on my friends jeans. i stayed attached to those jeans for 3 hours before they drove us to their "police station," which was just one room. needless to say, the charges were diverted and eventually dropped. now that i look at it, it's not all that funny of a story when it is typed out, but had you been there you would think it was. p.s. what the fuck?! this is the best smiley ever: 
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Rank: Thrash Admin
Joined: 3/25/2007
Posts: 810
Location: Plymouth, MA
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tasha_duh wrote:my last arrest story is anything, but funny. however, after one of my highschool proms when i was 16, a bunch of us went camping in some nh national park. apparently they're huge dicks and specifically look for younger kids there by themselves and just search their sites. we had four camp sites total, but only 3 of them had tents set up on them. a couple of us were on one of the tent sites, including myself, trying to get a fire going, while about 15 kids were hanging out on the empty one playing "killer hacky sack" where if you miss the ball or touch it with your hands you have to walk around in a circle and let everyone punch you. i think it's just a natural reaction for you to yell and swear and get pissed off when someone punches you, but apparently it's not a good idea to in a campground. needless to say, some crazy campground employee that thought he was hot shit and a couple cops came strolling onto the site. only thing is, instead of going to the empty site where everyone was yelling and shit, they came to the one where we were quietly setting up the fire and started looking in the tents. next thing we know we're all being handcuffed. only thing is there wasn't enough because it was some tiny ass little town. a couple people got handcuffed together, but for some reason i got handcuffed to the belt loop on my friends jeans. i stayed attached to those jeans for 3 hours before they drove us to their "police station," which was just one room. needless to say, the charges were diverted and eventually dropped. now that i look at it, it's not all that funny of a story when it is typed out, but had you been there you would think it was. p.s. what the fuck?! this is the best smiley ever: We do focus most of our energy on smilies, I am glad you appreciate them
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Rank: Guest
Joined: 3/25/2007
Posts: -24
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ITT: wannabe baddasses with no hope of ever being useful to society or the Hominid family.
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Rank: Thrash Demigod
Joined: 5/11/2008
Posts: 525
Location: Los Angeles, California
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Never been arrested or anything of that genre lol
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Rank: n00b
Joined: 7/24/2008
Posts: 17
Location: Chicago, Illinois
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I seen lynn straight from snot get arrested in chicago, for autographing someones hitter box, the cop thought it was his and naturally he resisted a little bit making his situation worse.
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